Top Ten Reasons To Retire

Retirement Humor, Is Work A
Nasty Four Letter Word?

There are many reasons to retire, but what are the top ten reasons to retire? Actually there are plenty more reasons to retire than stay working! Who wants to work anyway?

Work is hard, work is a nasty four letter word and working a life-time is really hard. The only thing to look forward to after a life-long career of work is getting to old enough to retire. The golden age of retirement is one of the mile marker’s in life. Turning 16 puts the road and far off lands within reach. Then comes 18 now considered an adult and can vote, go to war and live autonomously. Turning 21 is probably the most exciting age to turn for most because now it’s legal to imbibe tasty alcoholic drinks. What comes after 21? Honestly, nobody looks forward to turning 40 and being deemed over-the-hill. The only thing special about turning 40 is going out and buying that cherry-red, turbo-charged convertible. Here are my top ten reasons to retire...

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Probably the number one reason to retire is the most obvious one. Not having to put up with work. That goes for the work itself and the people encountered at work. Including but not limited to employees, employers and customers. Since we all know how fun it is to work with customers!

The second reason to retire is being able to spend time with friends and family. All those years laboring has led to little time with significant others. Retiring will help reset the clocks and earn back time, just think grand kids are the best. They get to go home with their parents after being filled with grandma’s candies!

The third reason to retire is having more time for none other than golf. Since retirement brings plenty of free-time, golf just happens to take a lot of free-time. It’s a match made in heaven. Plus, golfing is nearly the only way to get retirees out of the house and into the sun.

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The fourth reason to retire is actually enjoying the empty nest that took a lifetime of work to obtain. Hopefully, it’s a paid for nest by now! Remember the reason for work is to pay for everything before retiring.

The fifth reason to retire is to become crotchety and not giving a damn. It’s the right of passage, it’s been earned. Working for a lifetime will definitely contribute to this one! The best part is that it’s almost expected as people get older. It’s natural, right?

The sixth reason to retire is earning the official bad drivers license. This much like the previous one is earned. Go ahead, pull a u-turn in the middle of the street. No one will think twice when you’re retirement age. Parking in the handicap zones, no problem. Hell, park on the sidewalk no one will care.

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The seventh reason of the top ten reasons to retire is definitely to travel. Retirement brings lots of free time better start travelling to make the best of it. The best part is doing it in style. Remember the cherry-red, turbo-charged convertible purchased so many years ago? Now is the time to take advantage of it and head to Florida or other warm and sunny destinations.

The eighth reason to retire is being able to wake at the crack of dawn and not doing so for a boss. You are the boss now, time to do what ever suits your personal pleasures. Better get a head start on that and beat everyone to the Country Kitchen.

The ninth reason to retire is to have the time to start a new hobby. Since time will be on your side, you’ll need to consume some of it with mind-less duties. What’s more rewarding than gardening. Plus, it is the gift that keeps on giving, veggies that is.

The tenth and final reason to retire is the ability to do what you want whenever you want. This is the single most important reason to retire. Everything else revolves around this simple fact.

Although there are lots of reasons to retire these are the top ten reasons to retire.


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